Good and bad times.

My little tantrum on my previous post has ruffled a few feathers.  Sorry about that, but it was not meant to be taken personally. It has been a tough time here.   Ken returned to work on Monday of this week, resuming the four day week that his lung specialist insisted on, and by Wednesday he was in a bad way, living proof of Dr G's warning.  His vision has been blurred since he was in hospital, and his blood sugar readings through the roof.   Our chemist assured me that the steroids he is on for two weeks are definitely causing the erratic blood sugar readings, and it is nothing to worry about.
On Wednesday Ken visited our optician, who did all the usual tests, and blamed the same steroids for the rapid deterioration in Ken's cataracts.  We knew he had them, but they were slow growing, and not expected to bother him for some time yet, but now it looks as if he will have to have surgery before the end of the year.  Walking uphill to the car park, Ken was gasping for breath, and when we got home he said to me  "I'm tired of all this.  I think I'll quit work tomorrow, I just want to lie down and go to sleep and not wake up".  On Thursday morning he got up and went to work as usual.  I called him to ask if he'd handed in his notice, and he said  "No, I'm okay now". I feel like I'm on an emotional see saw.  One minute he's telling me he wants to die, the next thing he wants to keep working.  How does anyone stay sane through this?  I feel for him and support him as best I can, but it takes its toll on me too.
The one good thing that is happening to me at the moment is the exhibition of my vintage linens at Bundoora Homestead over the next couple of weeks.  It opened on Wednesday, and there has been a steady stream of people in to see it, and I have loved chatting to them all.  Some of the visitors were people I know from the Embroiderers Guild, some are readers of my blogs, and others are friends who came to say hi.  I've given a talk to a group of ladies from a suburban VIEW club, and they were a delightful group who said they thoroughly enjoyed my presentation.  I'll be doing another one to a larger group in the last week of the exhibition, and was surprised to learn that it was booked out weeks ago!  In between talking to the visitors, I've been sitting at a table stitching, and it has been such a calming influence on me at this time.   The staff at the homestead are concerned, and keep telling me to take a break!  I can't convince them that for me, sitting and sewing is the most relaxing thing I can do, and I am loving every minute.  No phone calls, housework, birds and cats to look after - it's great!  Ken is a bit cheesed off that I'll be there all weekend as well, but I need this time away from him and the house.  He knows where I am and if he needs me, I'm only 20 minutes away.