One week later and the waiting is over.

I don't know whether to be happy or sad. But at least we know where we stand, more or less. Ken had an appointment with the cardiologist at 4.45 pm today, and was going to hear the results of all the tests he has had. Yesterday, we had a message left on our answering machine: "This is Dr X's office. We have to cancel your appointment for tomorrow as Dr X is booked out. Please call to re-schedule". WELL! I had just got home - it was 5 minutes to 5 pm and their office closes at 5. I dialled their number and got their answering machine saying they had closed. So I left a caustic message saying that if they close the office at 5 pm, how about leaving the phone line open until that time? When Ken arrived home from his first day back at work (he will be working until Vic Roads actually cancel his bus licence), I told him the appointment was cancelled, and he visibly crumbled. He had been psyching himself up to this, and to be told he was going to have to wait again, was just too much.

This morning, I was on the phone to the cardiologist's office at 9.05 a.m. The girl who answered the phone recognised me immediately and apologised for last night, with some excuse about having to change their outgoing message, so they just happened to miss my call...yeah, pigs might fly too. Well, she shuffled papers and clicked keys and said the next available appointment was November 15th. I really saw red. "If we have to wait any longer to find out the results of his tests, not only will my husband have a heart attack, I will probably have a stroke, the way my blood pressure is!" I yelled down the phone, and the poor girl said she would give Dr X my message and ask him to phone me today. I went out and did my shopping and a few messages, and came back at 2 pm to find no messages waiting for me. So I called the office again, and this time, the doctor's secretary said "Oh hasn't he called you yet? Hold on please". So I held for a few minutes then a man's voice came on the line. I could hardly believe my luck; I mean this guy is one of the top blokes in his field, and I know he is unbelievably busy, so I didn't really expect him to speak to me, inspite of my tantrums! He was very sympathetic - he is actually a very nice guy, easy to talk to and explain things to you. He told me that Ken's tests confirmed the original diagnosis of his partner who did the first test - Ken's heart is weaker than it was last year, so they won't be able to recommend to Vic Roads that Ken retains his bus licence. But having said that, he said "But I still want to see him again soon to review his medications. While his heart won't get any better, with medication I can make sure it won't get any worse, so he can still find another job if he wants to - but less stressful than bus driving! But I am going to suggest to him that he retires, so he can at least enjoy the remaining years of his life".

I relayed all this to Ken when he came home, and waited for his reaction with my heart in my mouth. Would he throw a wobbly? Would he go 'into his cave', as the author of Men Are From Mars puts it? Well, neither of those. Ken went to the fridge, took out a beer and sat down to relax. He thanked me for doing all the chasing around, and said he wasn't surprised to hear the outcome, as everything had kind of been leading up to it. He felt the same as me - at least we know after all this time, and we can start planning the next stage of our lives. He had warned the boss at work that he would probably have to leave, and the boss said he would see if he could find another position in the company, but it would be difficult without that licence. But if that doesn't eventuate, Ken will have a look for some part time or casual work - perhaps in the retail field, as he has worked in shops before.

Overall, I was relieved that Ken was so philosophical about the outcome, but as he said, he has had time to adjust to the idea, so it wasn't such a shock. He is disappointed that he won't be driving buses much longer; he really enjoys that, despite the problems with passengers and traffic. Anyway, one door closes, another opens, as they say. Thanks to all of you who have been following our ongoing drama and leaving encouraging comments. I can't find enough words to express how much I appreciate opening my blogs and finding these kind words.